Monica Loved Bill - That Isn't An Excuse

By Amy Lockyear
Rightgrrl Contributor
March 13, 1999

Following is a response to a conversation that was taking place on my Marine wives email loop concerning prostitutes in Thailand, where many of our Marine husbands are badgered and pawed at when they go for shore leave there.  A discussion about Monica Lewinsky was taking place on the same loop at about that time.  I became distressed when I saw the bitter and condemning remarks regarding the prostitution but then luke-warm, forgiving comments on Monica Lewinsky's behalf.  I mean...these women were all committing the same crime, but one was being given lenience.  So, I watched the conversation progress without comment for awhile.  When one of my fellow loopers said, "But, it's different.  Monica loved Bill," I had to step in and give my two cents. 

Though I understand exactly what Monica was feeling, and though I have no doubt that she believed herself to be in love with our President, the woman went after and had a sexual affair with a married man.  Period.  End of story.  She did it with a married man and then committed purjury in court about it, later (yes, let's not forget that Ms. Lewinsky is a felon, as well.  If any of us had done that, we would be in prison right now).  She didn't do it for money to feed herself.  She didn't do it because it was the only life she had ever known.  She certainly didn't do it to keep from getting beaten and abused by a pimp or a husband who forces her to do what she does.

She did it because she had so little respect for the sanctity of marriage and for the integrity of the office of the President of the United States, that she couldn't control her little raging hormones. I am no older than Monica Lewinsky.  She is not only old enough to know better, she is old enough to be held accountable for her actions.  Her age and her gender have nothing to do with it.  The fact that she was "in love" has nothing to do with it either.  I have male friends that I love dearly, but I never went behind my husband's back and betrayed my vows.  As a single woman, I never went after attached or married men, either.

I have been tempted many times in my brief time here on earth, and I'm sure that most of us have been.  Let's face it, being lonely bites the big one. When a man comes up to me and tells me that I'm beautiful or offers to buy me a drink, it feels good.  I'm not saying I don't understand the "feelings."  Somehow, though, I've managed to keep my panties in place.

Infidelity is a choice whether you're the married one or the unmarried one involved.  We are the products of our choices.  I give no leniency to Ms. Lewinsky for her bad choices.  I feel no sympathy for her, and I certainly don't think she's any better than the prostitutes in Thailand.  At least they have a reason.  At least they have an excuse.  I hate that profession as much as any of us do.  I'm certainly not condoning the practice of selling our bodies for sex.  But I refuse to say that what Ms. Lewinsky did with the President is any less revolting, any less morally reprehensible, or any less sinful simply because she "loved" him.

This article copyright © 1999 by Amy Lockyear and may not be reproduced in any form without the express written consent of its author. All rights reserved.